Monday, February 16, 2009

Starting again

How crazy is this? I am fat. I want to be phat...I'm tired of being the funny fat friend. So here goes...I am married, my husband loves me for me(no really)...it is the anger and turmoil with in my self that I am trying to deal with.
I have always (haven't we all) tried to make the outside match the inside. And yeah, it only matters who you are in the inside...blah blah blah. Then I guess it doesn't matter that nothing fits, I delete pictures of myself and only look at myself from the chin(the first of the double) up.
My goal, as always is to feel better about myself, and lose the extra weight.
Did I mention I'm OCD, and have an addictive personality? so I tend to do things in waves...
I need to lose over 40lbs to make it to my goal.
Will I do it?
Does anyone care? That question is the kicker...It only matters to me...We shall see.
Will I keep up with this blog?
I can only hope so.
~phatfat

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